As so many of you requested (my inbox was flooded today!) Here is the latest batch of idiotic postings, grilled to perfection under a medium heat...
 

Oh, here we are, Grill Order 1!

>From: phil saretsky <pydesky@yahoo.com> ((SP Digest 7/3/98 A))
>Subject: WHY GOD WHY?
>
>Why can't you just post every email even if it doesn't relate to south
>park?

Well, This is the SOUTH PARK MAILING LIST!!! Whoooo! Besides, as YOU prove, posting every e-mail would result in a 1.6MB South Park Times full of "Kenny Died in that last episode!" Posts.

>Ocassionally south park gets boring and you want to talk about
>something else.

It's called USENET, and it has thousands of groups you can just talk to! Wow! Perhaps alt.sex.bizarre.animal would be just right for you....

>Is this such a crime that I haven't had anything posted in
>over a month?

No, It's a Blessing!

>Can you just let us talk about what we want to talk about for
>once instead of always talking about south park?

Oh god, perhaps we >>Want<< to talk about south park, that's why the damn list was made!!!!
Ouch, Well, now that that side dish is out of the way, onto the main course!
--------
Grill Order Two!
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>From: WLYE43B@prodigy.com ( TINA DEMASI)
>Subject: Random Thoughts
>
>Hey all,

Hi Ass--Oh, I mean Tina!

>I have to agree that "Summer Sucks" was the funniest episode this season .
>I heard someone say that we'll have to wait until next season to see what
>becomes of Mr. Hat... does that mean that SS was the season finale, and
>we'll be into reruns for a while?

Oh god, All it takes is one feeb to post how this is the end of the season...well it's NOT! We had 13 Episodes from last season, so would you think that CC would just order 6 for this one, then shuffle repeats until next year? Yeah....right....deep thoughts here people!

>It seems we have a lot of subscribers from Florida on here...
>I'm from
>Orlando and the recent horrible fires in the area prompted a state-wide ban
>on personal fireworks, and even a lot of professional fireworks displays
>were cancelled for the 4th of July. I don't think that this emergency
>situation inspired that episode of SP,

<grumble> I know my super kool scripts didn't... <Grumble>

>since the spisode would have to have
>been made weeks before the fires got out of hand, but the coincidence is
>eerie. Perhaps Matt & Trey ARE clairvoyant.

Yep, a state bans fireworks, joining many others, and it could be related to massive firestorms in Florida....Okay, you just keep on jamming those Q-Tips in that nasty ol' ear and see what Ideas pop up....

>To Taylor575 - good job on "Stan's Fat Ass." It is a nicely readable
>script, and you certainly have the characterization down!

Oh yes, you certainly have the repeating lame ass quotes and stupid situations down to a science, no wonder our friend Tina here just loves you SO much!

>To RezElfman TreDanny - I love your name. Elfman's a god.

Of course, I love anything with elfs...because <giggle> there's an elf-pig that lives in my closet, and he says he was a god too, well, like an angel...he said he used to live in Amityville, New York and his name was Jody....well, I don't know what an Amitiy-Vile Hourror is, so I dont mind...but those dang flies just keep swarming.....

>To Joe Austin, our fearless moderator - I think you're doing a great job as
>well... you put a lot of time and effort into making this list cool..
>but something is really starting to bug me. A lot of people will notice -
>and post about - the same thing

Oh no! Really? People like you?! Oh no, people always post about nice, meaningfull things and will always check to make sure they aren't talking about something posted 5 times before. "I am a spanish major and Took it for 8 years in college and I KNOW jimbo says "I am a lame ass stupid retard that molests wine drinking cats!"

>("Did anyone notice that the first kid to die was wearing a red shirt?")... do you have to print so many repeats?
>Sure, sometimes the note will contain other factoids not previously
>mentioned, but sometimes they DON'T, and it gets pretty darn repetitive
>after a while, as well as taking up valuable digest space.

Yes people, lets clear out all these posts to make way for nice, original content like "Stan's a Retarded Lard Ass" And who could forget the South Park times...always funny, fresh, and informative!

>Finally, Titanic references are coming fast and furious. It would be cool
>to have a T&P show tie in with Titanic... the theme song? "My Fart Will Go
>On." It's a thought.

Oh god, I thought the T&P episode crap was buried, but now we have a whole new breed of retard, who has to talk about how he just loved 30 minutes of fart jokes and how he or she would just love to see another....

>Tina in smoky Orlando
>"Spectacularrrr..."

Matt In Freezing Bangor, Maine
"You Suckkkkkkkkkk..."
-------
Well there you have it, My job is done for today. Strange, but there just didn't seem to be as many lame postings in the 7/3 and 7/4 digests that I got. Don't worry though, When a good one comes along, rest assured I will cook it to order!
---Another Parody by Matt Jolley
---Brainguy@csi.com
 
 


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