The Sci-Fi Channel
Flamed to Perfection by Matt Jolley
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I wonder what happened to all those lame Sci-Fi series that failed on NBC, CBS, or even FOX.  Oh yes, they've found a new home on The Sci-Fi channel, or SFC.  Sci-Fi...what a sinkhole of a channel.  I mean, the only thing worth watching on that waste of cable bandwidth is Mystery Science Theater 3000, which was canceled by them.  Of course, SFC didn't have the balls to say "Yeah, MST3K gets a million viewers a week, has the most popular website on our rancid server, and has a cult following, but were axing it to make way for some reject from NBC."  What those arrogant bastards (I don't normally curse, but they made me!) did was make it seem like Best Brains, the creators of MST3K , wanted to cancel it in a sappy press release.  The worst part was that they lied to the public to avoid a PR nightmare.  Oh, but let's look at what MST3K was dropped for, shall we?  Sci-Fi "Prime."  Oh boy, oh joy, let's look!  Sliders, after a dismal season on FOX, was....DROPPED!  That seems to be their flagship show, although a few of the characters have left the show.  The others that provide the "filler" for SFC are their "Original Series," or as I call them, "Cinematic Suppositories," because that's exactly what they are.  Not even on UPN would you find such horrific acting AND special effects.  Add to the mix classic Sci-Fi movies that are butchered by the fine folks at SFC and you've got one rancid channel, and no matter how hard you wipe it off your shoe, folks, the smell will never go away.  Sure, I'm bitter about MST3K being dropped, but I've always felt this way, but I've always had a "don't bite the hand that feeds you" complex, that I have been able to drop, just as I will try to do to SFC as soon as MST3K's run is over.  Perhaps I can get....*gasp*.....Comedy Central.

April 6, 1999 All Text (You Know Who You Are) Is (C)1999 By Matt Jolley
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